Even though Manatees lead a beautifully simple and satisfied existence, they ain't really the toughest or exciting of creatures. That medal goes to a creature that most people have probably never heard of.
You Probably think that an animal that at its biggest reaches less than 2cm probably wouldn't be very tough even in the arena of our back-boned colleagues but the Tardigrade or water bear is by all accounts fucking tough. I'll give you a list of its abilities....
Where can they live? - Pretty much anywhere, and by that i mean they have been found in hot springs or frozen ice, they have been found on top of the Himalayas or 6km below sea level, and of-coarse lakes, ponds and meadows, stone walls you name it.
What about temperature ranges?- Well they can survive being boiled at 151c for a few minutes down to 1c above absolute Zero (that's colder than space). They can be chilled for days at -200c, nearly 4 times colder than either of our poles.
Don't they get crushed under pressure or explode without it?- In a word...no. They can survive in the vacuum of space or 6,000 atmospheres of pressure, try swimming to the floor of a diving pool and you will get an appreciation of withstanding pressure (ocean divers are crazy).
Will dehydration kill them?- You can guess where I'm going with this. They can survive a decade without any water and be fine, you try and go without a drink for a day and see what its like.
And Radiation? - A lot of people are scared by radiation poisoning what with the uproar against nuclear power and all, 1-2,000 rads of radiation is enough to kill you. Our tiny, tough little friends can take up to 570,000 rads.
All these facts clearly lead to one logical conclusion, they are some sort of interstellar race of fighting beasts. They have been waiting round since the Cambrian for their time to strike out against a worthy opponent. They are still biding their time....
Friday, 24 October 2008
What kind of animal would you be?
It's one of those half arsed questions you sometimes hear and usually give a half arsed answer to. Many people reply to it with either something cuddly like a rabbit, or something at the top of the food chain like a shark or a tiger. But when you think into the problem would you really want to be any of those creatures?
Starting with the cute and cuddly. If you're not locked up in a cage as someones little entertaining prisoner, you're running for your life and when not running your paranoid of being spotted as you much your meal. And the bitch of it is that you will probably get the shit kicked out of you when your desperately trying to get laid.
It may seem better at the top when you get to choose the innocent victim that will constitute your next source of energy but when you think about it there are a lot of others doing the same. So when you have finally managed to wrestle the struggling, screaming chunk of meat to the ground, you have to then vigerously defend it from all those bastards who want to take advantage of all your hard work. And then there is the point of being ridiculed by the Homo sapain population for just trying to stay alive, or maybe they just like you either for your fur or the fact that you make a very expensive smug soup.
And still you get the shit kicked out of you when you feel the need to shoot DNA at the opposite sex.
These types of problems trouble my mind when i have nothing else useful to think about and then one day when i was browsing on youtube i realised that one animal possibly had the best and easyest of lives (better than parasites due to the fact that most people like these animals).
Look at the life of a Manatee, you have no natural predators, you spend all day swimming around munching on sea grass, occasionally have sex when you fell the time is right and if your really lucky you get to meet David Attenborough sometimes. The only thing you have to worry about is the occasional twat on a speed boat, but when that does happen no one bitches about it being the way of nature and the majority of people and genuinely on your side. The weight of the world doesn't bare on their shoulders and they don't even have to bare their own weight anymore, moving back to water was clearly the right move.
If I am delusional or clearly wrong please tell me so.
Starting with the cute and cuddly. If you're not locked up in a cage as someones little entertaining prisoner, you're running for your life and when not running your paranoid of being spotted as you much your meal. And the bitch of it is that you will probably get the shit kicked out of you when your desperately trying to get laid.
It may seem better at the top when you get to choose the innocent victim that will constitute your next source of energy but when you think about it there are a lot of others doing the same. So when you have finally managed to wrestle the struggling, screaming chunk of meat to the ground, you have to then vigerously defend it from all those bastards who want to take advantage of all your hard work. And then there is the point of being ridiculed by the Homo sapain population for just trying to stay alive, or maybe they just like you either for your fur or the fact that you make a very expensive smug soup.
And still you get the shit kicked out of you when you feel the need to shoot DNA at the opposite sex.
These types of problems trouble my mind when i have nothing else useful to think about and then one day when i was browsing on youtube i realised that one animal possibly had the best and easyest of lives (better than parasites due to the fact that most people like these animals).
Look at the life of a Manatee, you have no natural predators, you spend all day swimming around munching on sea grass, occasionally have sex when you fell the time is right and if your really lucky you get to meet David Attenborough sometimes. The only thing you have to worry about is the occasional twat on a speed boat, but when that does happen no one bitches about it being the way of nature and the majority of people and genuinely on your side. The weight of the world doesn't bare on their shoulders and they don't even have to bare their own weight anymore, moving back to water was clearly the right move.
If I am delusional or clearly wrong please tell me so.
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